Overcoming Your Fear Of Failure
Being afraid of failure also known as Atychiphobia can be a very debilitating feeling and condition which can impacts various aspects of our well being as well as our own accomplishments and rate of personal growth.
I am interested in exploring this notion today because I think that much of society is nowadays concerned with some sort of ideal “perfect” life which tells us how to live and work properly and does not leave much room for making healthy mistakes (being “imperfect”) and learning from them.
In this way, being afraid of failure and striving for a perfectionistic way of living slows down our development as a person because we are so concerned and preoccupied with how others perceive us that we forget who we really are, what we enjoy doing and most worryingly we become afraid of making mistakes, effectively ceasing growth as an individual.
In this blog post, my aim is to explore the causes of having an irrational fear of failure, learning how to spot it in our life as well as what are the wellbeing related effects of it and how we can best overcome it so we can return back to our best selves.
I hope you enjoy ☀️
CAUSES
Critical upbringing: If during your childhood, your parents or care givers were very critical and unsupportive of what you did or wanted to do, this can later on translate into having a fear of failure since you could never as a child live up to their expectations.
Family history: Phobias, anxiety and depression can increase the likeness of developing a fear of failure later on.
Low self esteem: People which start out with a lower self esteem are much more likely to experience having a fear of failure.
Traumatic experiences: If in your upbringing or past you have experienced abuse or severe punishments when you have done something wrong and failed at something, then this makes you much more likely to be afraid of making any further mistakes down the line because of the repercussions linked to failing at something
Definition of failure: What we define as failure and success if often based on our own expectations or the expectations of others, where if these expectations are too high you may find it very hard to live up to them and a result feel that the risks off trying something new are too high so you do not end up doing anything at all.
Genetics: Being prone to anxiety has been shown to be genetically linked which further increases the chances that you develop Atychiphobia.
Perfectionism: In perfectionism, people set themselves very high expectations and standards to live by where by they believe that if they make mistakes they will be seen as not perfect causing them to fear making mistakes. Alternatively, perfectionists may have the fear of not reaching their own high standards and as a result also experience a fear of failure.
HOW IT SHOWS ITSELF
Some of the most common signs of being afraid of failing at something include:
Being frequently angry or irritable
Caring a lot about how other perceive you
Being pessimistic about life
Being prone to procrastination if something seems challenging
Finding it hard to accept constructive criticism
Being worried that you will disappoint others if you fail
Thinking that your own imperfections and minor let downs will make people think differently of you
Telling others that you will probably find anyways in order to keep the expectations of others low
Underestimating your own abilities so that you avoid feeling let down by yourself
Placing your self worth based on what others think of you
ITS EFFECTS
When having a strong fear of failure, the following consequences are most common:
Taking part in self sabotaging behaviors which further impair your progress
Feeling shame, inadequacy or disappointment
Procrastination
Having low motivation
Experiencing a decrease in self esteem
HOW TO OVERCOME IT
Below you can find a couple of pieces of advice which can help you with overcoming a fear of failure:
Identify what is causing it
Break down large ambitious goals into small and actionable steps
Developing a growth mindset
Reaffirming to yourself that you are enough
Doing or starting the project or idea you have been putting of
Having a strong support system of friends or family which you can fall back on
Be mindful of your alcohol and caffeine consumption to not make you stress or anxiety or worse
Get the basic health elements in check: Good sleep, a balanced diet and taking part in some daily exercise
Become aware of the things you can control within your life and what is our of your control
Planning ahead and visualizing obstacles ahead of time
Redefining your idea of failure
Asking yourself what is the worst possible outcome that can come out of doing this?
🧠 KEY IDEAS
In this blog post we have discussed the subject of fear of failure, where we first explored what causes it, how it can be observed, the effects of fear of failure and lastly, how to overcome it in order to become your best self.
✏️ REFERENCES
Castrillon, C. (2022, October 16). How To Cope With The Fear Of Failure. Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/carolinecastrillon/2022/10/16/how-to-cope-with-the-fear-of-failure/
Brooks, A. C. (2022, April 7). How to Overcome a Fear of Failure. The Atlantic. https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2021/02/how-overcome-fear-failure/618130/
Professional, C. C. M. (n.d.). Atychiphobia (Fear of Failure). Cleveland Clinic. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/22555-atychiphobia-fear-of-failure#:~:text=What is atychiphobia%3F-,Atychiphobia is an intense fear of failure.,an exam or job interview.
MSEd, K. C. (2023). How to Deal With the Fear of Failure. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-fear-of-failure-5176202
