Lifestyle Taya Bregant Lifestyle Taya Bregant

20 Questions To Find Your Core Self

Building and uncovering your true sense of identity is one of the hardest yet most crucial things we can take our time to figure out.

Having this identity means that you, as a person, know yourself better in terms of what you want, what drives you, what aspects you want to grow, and where your goals lie. With this knowledge, you are much better able to steer and direct your actions, and thus your life path, in a way that aligns with the values and goals that you have clarified for yourself. In short, taking the time to know yourself ensures that you make more aligned choices and, in the end, live life in accordance with your true self and what feels right to you. You are living your own life for yourself, as opposed to following others' definitions of success or happiness.

It is not about becoming fully self-sufficient or completely independent from others, as interdependence is always beneficial and healthy. Rather, it is about having a comfortable and assured footing in who you are as a person and knowing what you truly stand for.

The questions below are timeless and can be used to navigate and shape your personal journey or exploration. These questions are in no specific order of importance and do not need to be answered in their written order. Spend some time pondering each question, noting what comes to mind, and identifying what resonates as true. There is no pressure of right or wrong answers here; the only correct answer is one that feels truthful and genuine to you.

CORE QUESTIONS

  1. Describe your current self in 3-5 words. Are you happy with that description, or would you like to change it in some way?

  2. What are your top 5 values as an individual, and are you living in accordance with those values?

  3. What are your top skills and strengths?

  4. What are you truly passionate about, and what makes you feel fully immersed?

  5. Which activities do you find fun and consider to be your hobbies or side interests?

  6. Are you more of an extrovert or introvert, and how could you organize your life so that it would better suit those needs?

  7. Who are your main inspirations and why?

  8. Which people in your life matter most to you, and how can you further nurture your relationship with them?

  9. What are some of your short and long-term goals in the following categories: Career/academics, health, relationships, finances, and spirituality.

  10. In which areas and how specifically would you like to grow or improve as an individual (Health, career, academics, spirituality, relationships, finances, etc.)?

  11. At what time of the day do you find that you function or work best, and what changes in your current lifestyle could you make to assist those preferences?

  12. Would you consider that you are managing your time well?

  13. What are some of your main fears or worries which are currently holding you back from exercising your true potential?

  14. What are you ashamed of or feel insecure about?

  15. Do you concern yourself a lot with how others view you or think of you?

  16. What were some of your biggest mistakes that you’ve made, and what were you able to learn from them?

  17. Up to this date, what are some of your proudest accomplishments and also some of the biggest failures?

  18. Since one year ago, how have you changed or grown as a person?

  19. If you continued going down your current path, where do you imagine yourself in 1 year, 5 years, or 10 years?

  20. How do you want people to remember you? What kind of impression do you want to leave behind?

FINAL THOUGHTS

I hope that you find these questions useful and that you find them helpful in your journey of personal discovery and growth. You can always return back to these questions whenever you feel that you have fallen slightly out of touch or out of alignment with yourself and in doing so will make sure to get yourself back on the right path once again.

Thank you for taking your time to read this 😊

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People Skills: Why They Matter

WHAT ARE PEOPLE SKILLS?

Most of us have probably come across the term “people skills,” but what is actually meant by this?

People skills, also known as soft or interpersonal skills, refer to skills, attributes, and competencies which allow us to work and cooperate well with others. These skills are all about how we interact with one another and how we communicate and exchange our ideas and thoughts in social circles.

Since being able to work and interact with others is an integral part of our lives, whether it be in school or in career settings, people skills are extremely important in both everyday life and also for your career or personal ambitions.

WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT?

So now that we know what people skills are, what are, in practical terms, the main reasons for why they are important:

  • They are essential for building relationships.

  • Make up the foundation of a well-functioning team.

  • They minimize social conflict and misunderstandings between people.

  • Enable you to influence people's ideas and views.

  • Being able to effectively advance your career by building useful connections.

WHAT ARE THE ESSENTIAL SKILLS?

  • Effective communication: Being able to communicate well is essential in getting along with others, persuading them, as well as establishing clear boundaries and expectations.

  • Having patience with others: Although some of us are more patient than others, patience is key to maintaining a sense of level-headedness and calm, which further facilitates the building of enjoyable relationships without immediately going after short-term rewards.

  • Emotionally regulating yourself: This concerns being able to keep yourself calm and collected, as well as knowing when to speak up and when to hold back your thoughts and words at appropriate timing. It means being able to properly react to criticisms and effectively deliver critique as well.

  • Showing empathy: Empathy is essential for trying to understand the emotional state of someone else to the best of our ability, allowing us to relate better to others, be more vulnerable with them, and show genuine interest in the other person. All of these contribute to making the relationship stronger.

  • Having active listening skills: Have you ever listened to someone but not truly heard what they were saying? This is because listening and truly actively listening to what someone is saying are two different things. Active listening means that you let the person fully finish their thoughts, and only once they finish, you first reiterate what they have said to make sure you have fully understood them, and only then do you offer them your own perspective.

  • Being able to persuade others: Persuasion is quite a complex skill in itself, but it is heavily based on empathy and understanding the other person's motives and wants. If you are able to blend in valuable social skills such as being a good communicator and listener, you are much more able to persuade others and even negotiate with them.

  • Showing interest in others: People love it when we show interest in their ideas, beliefs, or daily activities. This is not to say we should only be talking about the other person, but showing interest in others can make a great start for a new friendship. If you show interest in someone, the other person is much more likely to reciprocate that back.

  • Having a good sense of humor: Humor is a very effective way to loosen up tense situations and make yourself more approachable to others, as everyone appreciates a laugh here and there. Laughter shows people that you are fun to be around and that there are other aspects than work with which people can relate to you.

  • Maintaining honesty: Honesty is an integral part of building long-lasting trusting relationships. It can result in positive compounding effects since if people see you are able to uphold a genuine relationship, that will attract more people towards you.

  • Leadership roles and abilities: There will most likely be times in our lives where we have to take up some sort of leadership roles. Leadership, in itself, is very much a soft people skill that encompasses many different kinds of skills such as assertiveness, listening, clear communication, empathy, and being able to coordinate and organize people well in groups.

  • Having good manners: This is rather a basic but often forgotten consideration, involving doing simple things such as saying please and thank you or being truly present when someone is talking to you or helping someone out when they clearly need a quick helping hand. These small gestures can be incredibly helpful in accelerating your own relationships and add an element of respect to daily social interaction.

HOW TO DEVELOP THESE SKILLS

When it comes to building and strengthening people skills, it is most effective to go into the world and simply practice than, for example, to approach it from a more theoretical standpoint, such as reading a book.

Below are a couple of ideas for how you can sharpen your own people skills:

  • Taking part in more team projects where you have to actively practice good listening and communication skills, as well as leadership roles.

  • Taking an (online) course or workshop with other people whom you can practice these key skills with.

  • Talking to someone new at your school or workplace.

  • Keeping the above-mentioned essential people skills in mind when interacting with people you already know.

  • Asking people who know you well for how they think you could improve your communication or empathy skills.

  • Becoming more aware of your non-verbal way of interacting with people, such as the type of body language which you use.

FINAL THOUGHTS

Overall, having a solid set of people skills is essential for being able to properly work well with other people, whether it be in a school or professional setting. It is also a skill which is becoming increasingly more needed and valued due to the incorporation of more technology into our daily lives, where practicing these foundational people skills can add a much-needed aspect of humanness into our daily lives as well as building valuable and trusting relationships in the process.

Go out and strike up a conversation with someone new.

Be willing to step out of your comfort zone and work on these skills because they most likely will be more universally and timelessly, applicable than you can imagine.

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Getting Back On Track After The Holidays

With the New Year's and Christmas holidays now behind us, it is time to turn our attention forward and work towards getting back on track after the festivities.

In today's post, we will explore exactly that, offering practical advice drawn from my own experiences to make this transition as seamless and enjoyable as possible.

If you are eager to resume your routine after some time off or seeking guidance or advice on this topic, then you have come to the right place.

I hope you gain something valuable from this 🥰

HOW TO GET BACK ON TRACK

Determine Your Intentions

The first step in getting back on track is to step back into alignment with yourself and determine in which direction you want to head. In this sense, you have to determine what your top priorities are going forward, for example, in both your personal and professional life and why you prioritize these things.

Additionally, consider which habits you want to build and that would benefit you most when it comes to getting back on track. Some habits, such as these, include building a consistent sleep schedule or prioritizing a varied and nutritious diet.

Make a note of these intentions and habits and keep it as a reference for yourself somewhere where you won't forget about it.

Setting Relevant Goals

Goals can be a very useful and more concrete way of visualizing and establishing your sense of direction and personal aspirations.

Here you want to determine what you want to achieve from today onwards and always have a clear “why” in your head, as this will keep you grounded throughout your whole journey towards your goals.

To ensure that you set your goals in the most useful ways, make sure to design your goals based on the SMART framework, which will make sure that your goals are well-established and that you can realistically achieve them in the time period you set to do them in. There is no good in setting highly unrealistic goals, as you will only be demotivated as a result.

I am not trying to say not to dream big, but I think it is much better to set a realistically sized goal or one which is slightly outside your comfort zone so that you make sure you can still achieve it and that it will give you an adequate boost of confidence and motivation to keep going.

Establishing Functional Routines

Although for some people routines may carry a negative connotation, routines which we set ourselves in our personal or professional lives can be a great way to support our long-term success and any habits which we want to keep up with.

In the mornings, for example, routines can be a great way to mentally prepare ourselves for the day ahead while in the evenings, they can be very useful for calming us down and helping us to unwind after a long day.

What's most important is that you design and pursue a routine that not only works and supports your lifestyle but that you also enjoy doing. If you don't enjoy something, it will make it that much harder to follow through with something in the long term.

It’s also important to mention that just because one routine works for someone, it does not mean it works for everyone else. Everyone is different, with different preferences and styles of working best, which is why it is key to design this routine based on your own lifestyle and intentions.

Lastly, contrary to what is commonly portrayed on the internet or on social media, these routines do not have to be extremely long, complicated, or painstakingly unenjoyable. The main point of a routine is to help you build consistency with something - what that activity is and how you choose to promote being consistent at that activity is up to you. Have fun with it :)

Curating Your Environment

If we want to best ensure that we successfully follow through on the goals, intentions, and routines which we previously established, our environment plays a huge role in making these aspirations as effortless and accessible as possible.

For example, if one of your goals after returning back from a long holiday is to return to a balanced and healthy diet, then it will likely not be of much use to keep loads of unhealthy and processed snacks or drinks at home.

Similarly, if one of the intentions which you set yourself is to be able to productively focus for longer periods of time, it makes sense to turn off or put away any potential sources of distractions whether that be in your digital or physical space.

The idea is to align and design your environment - your living and working space - in a way which supports your goals and intentions. This is a key step as it makes following through with your commitments as frictionless as possible.

Sticking To A Schedule

One of the key reasons for scheduling your activities or your personal commitments into a weekly or monthly schedule is that it promotes consistency. Consistency is one of the most underestimated yet high-yielding skills anyone can develop over time, and it allows you to consistently work, build, or improve on something ultimately helping you to get closer to that goal or achievement that you are striving for.

Based on the goals, habits, and routines which you want to implement into your lifestyle, figure out which of these activities is best done on a daily, weekly, monthly, or yearly basis and try to enter them into a calendar or some sort of task tracking software.

If you make these repetitions automatic it once again makes the process of sticking through your commitments that much more likely since you also won't forget about what you promised to yourself.

Creating Accountability

Depending on your current level of discipline, you may find that sticking to a set routine or schedule constantly can be quite challenging and effort-intensive, especially when the unpredictability of life comes our way.

One way to make this process of building consistency of a habit or ritual is to do these activities with someone else or share your personal goals and commitments with other close people who support you so that they can every so often check up on your progress and keep you on track.

Accountability is the foundation of doing anything consistently.

That is not to say that accountability only comes in the form of doing something with someone else, but can also be done through setting reminders on your phone or other devices to remind you of your intentions and routines that you are gradually building.

Realize What Is Within Your Circle Of Control

You have to acknowledge that no matter how clear or well-established your intentions are, that sometimes unpredictable aspects of life will come in our way, usually in the times we least expect it. This is a normal part of life and it is important to be able to not only be aware of this phenomenon but to also take it into account for when we are planning our lives.

There will always be some aspects of our life which we can control and others which are completely out of our circle of control.

If you find that something gets in the way of you achieving your plans, identify whether this is a factor that you have control over and if so, how can you prevent it from derailing you in the future. If it's something you can't control, then realize that the best way to go about this is to accept it for what it is since you can't really change anything about it and realize that everyone has to make peace with such factors.

Staying Flexible

Relating to the previous point, when we do find that something derails us off of our track - whether it is something unpredictable that happens in our daily environment or when we feel our personal willpower or discipline starting to wane - we need to be flexible and adaptable to get our feet back on track.

We have to realize that whether and how we get ourselves back on the right course towards our goals is much more important than the number of times we get derailed. In the end, the people who are most resilient and most adaptable to unpredictable circumstances are also the ones who are much more likely to reach and fulfill their aspirations.

It all takes practice and gradual daily improvements where it's key to know that one setback or wrong step won't mess up your entire journey.

Reward And Repeat

Once you have a routine established that works for you and you are successfully staying consistent, make sure to also every once in a while reward yourself to stay motivated and encourage yourself to keep going.

All of this consistency is at the end of the day very similar to the process of habit building for which we need a reason to keep doing or repeating something.

Additionally, the motivation to continue doing something does not necessarily only have to come from rewards per se, but is actually commonly the result of doing or starting to do something in the first place. Contrary to common belief, motivation is the result of action, instead of motivation being a prerequisite to starting or doing something.

Make sure that this reward or incentive for continuing to do something is something that you actually enjoy and get pleasure out of. It doesn't only have to be limited to treating yourself to a physical gift or some other material good (however if that is what you like best then go for it), but it can also be extended to treating yourself to an experience for yourself or with your friends, or enjoying some good food or going for a weekend/day trip to somewhere.

Life is also in large part about having fun and enjoying the process, so why not make the process of getting to your goals as enjoyable as possible?

Be Kind To Yourself

Lastly, keep in mind that occasionally everyone makes mistakes, makes a wrong decision, or does something to a lesser standard than what we promised to ourselves.

In such situations, there is little point in beating yourself up over it since that will just completely discourage you from ever getting back on track but instead first realize that setbacks like these happen to everyone and secondly, that the way you react or get back up from setbacks is within your control.

You can't always choose how many times you fall down but you can always choose how many times you choose to get back up. Use that to your advantage.

We are all only human at the end of the day giving each day our best effort, so make sure to be kind to yourself on this journey and to take care of yourself and those who support you.

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Becoming The Best Version Of Yourself

We all aspire to become better versions of ourselves than we were yesterday, living in alignment with our values and intentions. Striving for personal growth and progress can sometimes feel more overwhelming and challenging than necessary, which is why I've written a concise guide that simplifies the process of continuous self-improvement.

I hope that today's post inspires you to find practical ways to enhance yourself as an individual, making this journey as accessible and actionable as possible because we all aim to evolve into better versions of ourselves.

I hope you find this post enjoyable and valuable.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE THE BEST VERSION OF YOURSELF?

Becoming the best version of yourself is a highly individualized journey that encompasses various aspects of personal growth, ultimately requiring you to live authentically in alignment with what resonates with you at your core, which includes honoring your values, preferences, and boundaries, without compromising your identity for the sake of others; the key is to prioritize activities and processes that empower you and nurture your well-being.

Your best self is a unique creation, tailored to your aspirations, and not necessarily mirroring the expectations of those around you; the objective is to continually refine your own vision of what brings out your true potential and keeps you on the path of authenticity and self-improvement.

Remember that your perception of your best self can evolve over time; it's not a static state but signifies ongoing personal growth and development.

To achieve your best self, it's vital to take charge of the aspects of your life that are within your control; while we can't control every facet of our existence, focusing on enhancing the areas that are manageable sets you on the road to success.

Finally, acknowledge that the path to self-improvement is not always smooth; life is inherently imperfect, and we can't have total control over every circumstance. However, it's crucial to remain committed to your personal growth journey, even in the face of challenges, and give your best effort, knowing that not everything will always go as planned.

HOW TO BECOME THE BEST VERSION OF YOU


Prioritize Your Health

  • Sleep: Sleep is essential for overall health and well-being, allowing the body to rest, repair, and consolidate memories while promoting physical and mental health.

  • Movement: Exercise is crucial for maintaining physical health and overall well-being, improving cardiovascular fitness, building and maintaining muscle strength, managing weight, and enhancing mental and emotional health.

  • Nutrition: Nutrition is vital for sustaining health and providing essential nutrients for energy, growth, maintenance, and disease prevention.

  • Stress management: Stress management is necessary for maintaining mental and physical well-being by reducing the negative impact of chronic stress on the body, promoting emotional resilience, and improving overall quality of life.

  • Social well-being: Having a social circle is important for emotional support, companionship, and a sense of belonging, contributing to mental and emotional well-being and providing a valuable network in times of need.

Establish The Fundamentals

  • Develop discipline: Having discipline and self-management is important for achieving personal and professional goals, maintaining consistency, and making responsible choices leading to long-term success and well-being.

  • Define your core values: Defining your core values is important as it provides a clear and meaningful framework for decision-making, goal setting, and living a life that aligns with your authentic self.

  • Practice having a growth mindset: Having a growth mindset is crucial as it fosters a belief in the ability to learn, adapt, and improve, leading to increased resilience, motivation, and personal development.

  • Prioritize what matters to you: Prioritizing what matters to you is essential because it allows you to focus your time, energy, and resources on your most meaningful goals and values, leading to a more fulfilling and purposeful life.

  • Let go of limiting beliefs: Letting go of limiting beliefs is important because it empowers personal growth, fosters a positive self-image, and opens the door to new opportunities and achievements.

  • Be compassionate towards yourself: Being compassionate towards yourself is important for maintaining mental and emotional well-being, reducing self-criticism and stress, and promoting self-acceptance and resilience in the face of life's challenges.

  • Visualize your future self: Visualizing your future self is important as it provides motivation, clarity, and a sense of direction to work toward your desired goals and aspirations.

Start Prioritizing Your Own Personal Growth

  • Start showing up for yourself: You are responsible for your progress and actions, so you must make the effort to show up for yourself because no one else can be you.

  • Create empowering rituals: Rituals and routines that work for you can be incredibly empowering and effective, helping you get into the right mindset, set intentions, and carry out tasks with minimal hesitation or procrastination.

  • Work on your strengths: Identifying and working on your strengths allows intentional self-improvement, helping you become better at what you already excel at or venture into learning new skills and knowledge.

  • Embrace failures and mistakes: Embracing failures and mistakes is important for personal growth, learning, and resilience, as they provide valuable lessons and opportunities for improvement.

  • Challenge yourself every day: Challenging yourself daily is important for personal growth and skill development, fostering adaptability and a sense of achievement.

  • Set and go after your goals: Setting your goals and guiding the direction of your life empowers you to feel in control of where you are headed and how you get there.

  • Celebrate small victories: Focusing on celebrating small meaningful victories boosts motivation and proves you are headed in the right direction.

Master Time Management And Productivity

  • Just get to doing it: Simply put, don't delay things you want to do because getting something done is about starting and finishing it through.

  • Remove distractions: Controlling and limiting distractions is essential for focus and productivity, especially when trying to complete tasks.

  • Time yourself during tasks: Deciding in advance how long to complete a task forces you to finish it within that time period and reduces procrastination.

  • Practice calendar blocking: Visualizing your weeks or days and ensuring you can feasibly complete tasks scheduled for a given day or week is crucial for productivity.

  • Stop looking for shortcuts: Acknowledge that self-improvement takes continuous effort, patience, and hard work, so focus on enjoying the process of becoming the best version of yourself as much as possible.

Take Care Of Your Personal Relationships

  • Accept help from others: Accepting help promotes collaboration, strengthens relationships, and enables personal and collective progress.

  • Keep in touch with people who matter most to you: Maintaining strong connections, fostering emotional support, and nurturing a sense of belonging and well-being are crucial.

  • Help other people become the best version of themselves: Supporting each other's self-improvement and personal growth can be a mutually beneficial and rewarding process.

  • Give back to people and society: Giving back to society contributes to community well-being, addresses social needs, and fosters a sense of purpose and interconnectedness.

FINDING MOTIVATION

Becoming the best version of yourself demands daily effort and a continuous drive for self-improvement, which may initially seem daunting due to the requirement for discipline and consistency. Nevertheless, the rewards and results are undoubtedly worth the journey.

To enhance your chances of success, it's essential to uncover the underlying reasons for making these life changes and, importantly, to find ways to make the process of self-improvement as enjoyable as possible. This ensures not only a more enjoyable journey but also increases the likelihood of sticking with it and achieving the desired results. Maintaining discipline and consistency hinges on understanding your motivations and setting rewards and milestones along the way.

When it comes to motivation, we can categorize it into two common types:

Intrinsic motivation: This type of motivation arises from within yourself and is driven by your own beliefs, values, and priorities. An example is your desire to grow and improve as an individual simply because you find the process personally fulfilling or enjoy the challenges it presents.

Extrinsic motivation: In contrast, this motivation is triggered by external factors, which can be positive or negative. Examples of positive reinforcement include receiving rewards, verbal praise, good grades, or positive results. Extrinsic motivation can also be driven by the desire to avoid negative consequences, such as punishment or criticism.

Balancing both types of motivation is ideal to ensure a well-rounded and sustainable drive for self-improvement.

Additionally it is important to note, that often we incorrectly think that we need a boost of inspiration or motivation to get us to do something where actually just starting something, will itself give us the motivation to continue going. Therefore motivation is actually sourced from action itself instead of having to first wait for motivation to do something.

KEY IDEAS

If you want to continuously become a better version of yourself, then you have come to the right place. In todays blog post we are discussion exactly that; everything it takes for you to become that leveled up version of yourself which you desire and strive for.

REFERENCES

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Overcoming Your Fear Of Failure

Being afraid of failure also known as Atychiphobia can be a very debilitating feeling and condition which can impacts various aspects of our well being as well as our own accomplishments and rate of personal growth.

I am interested in exploring this notion today because I think that much of society is nowadays concerned with some sort of ideal “perfect” life which tells us how to live and work properly and does not leave much room for making healthy mistakes (being “imperfect”) and learning from them.

In this way, being afraid of failure and striving for a perfectionistic way of living slows down our development as a person because we are so concerned and preoccupied with how others perceive us that we forget who we really are, what we enjoy doing and most worryingly we become afraid of making mistakes, effectively ceasing growth as an individual.

In this blog post, my aim is to explore the causes of having an irrational fear of failure, learning how to spot it in our life as well as what are the wellbeing related effects of it and how we can best overcome it so we can return back to our best selves.

I hope you enjoy ☀️

CAUSES

  • Critical upbringing: If during your childhood, your parents or care givers were very critical and unsupportive of what you did or wanted to do, this can later on translate into having a fear of failure since you could never as a child live up to their expectations.

  • Family history: Phobias, anxiety and depression can increase the likeness of developing a fear of failure later on.

  • Low self esteem: People which start out with a lower self esteem are much more likely to experience having a fear of failure.

  • Traumatic experiences: If in your upbringing or past you have experienced abuse or severe punishments when you have done something wrong and failed at something, then this makes you much more likely to be afraid of making any further mistakes down the line because of the repercussions linked to failing at something

  • Definition of failure: What we define as failure and success if often based on our own expectations or the expectations of others, where if these expectations are too high you may find it very hard to live up to them and a result feel that the risks off trying something new are too high so you do not end up doing anything at all.

  • Genetics: Being prone to anxiety has been shown to be genetically linked which further increases the chances that you develop Atychiphobia.

  • Perfectionism: In perfectionism, people set themselves very high expectations and standards to live by where by they believe that if they make mistakes they will be seen as not perfect causing them to fear making mistakes. Alternatively, perfectionists may have the fear of not reaching their own high standards and as a result also experience a fear of failure.

HOW IT SHOWS ITSELF

Some of the most common signs of being afraid of failing at something include:

  • Being frequently angry or irritable

  • Caring a lot about how other perceive you

  • Being pessimistic about life

  • Being prone to procrastination if something seems challenging

  • Finding it hard to accept constructive criticism

  • Being worried that you will disappoint others if you fail

  • Thinking that your own imperfections and minor let downs will make people think differently of you

  • Telling others that you will probably find anyways in order to keep the expectations of others low

  • Underestimating your own abilities so that you avoid feeling let down by yourself

  • Placing your self worth based on what others think of you

ITS EFFECTS

When having a strong fear of failure, the following consequences are most common:

  • Taking part in self sabotaging behaviors which further impair your progress

  • Feeling shame, inadequacy or disappointment

  • Procrastination

  • Having low motivation

  • Experiencing a decrease in self esteem

HOW TO OVERCOME IT


Below you can find a couple of pieces of advice which can help you with overcoming a fear of failure:

  • Identify what is causing it

  • Break down large ambitious goals into small and actionable steps

  • Developing a growth mindset

  • Reaffirming to yourself that you are enough

  • Doing or starting the project or idea you have been putting of

  • Having a strong support system of friends or family which you can fall back on

  • Be mindful of your alcohol and caffeine consumption to not make you stress or anxiety or worse

  • Get the basic health elements in check: Good sleep, a balanced diet and taking part in some daily exercise

  • Become aware of the things you can control within your life and what is our of your control

  • Planning ahead and visualizing obstacles ahead of time

  • Redefining your idea of failure

  • Asking yourself what is the worst possible outcome that can come out of doing this?

🧠 KEY IDEAS

In this blog post we have discussed the subject of fear of failure, where we first explored what causes it, how it can be observed, the effects of fear of failure and lastly, how to overcome it in order to become your best self.

✏️ REFERENCES

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How To Be A Better Communicator

I think that being a good communicator and knowing how to communicate well is one of the best skills you can learn. This is because communication occurs in so many different occasions and aspects of our life, everything from how we communicate with our family, partners, friends, work colleagues, bosses and even ourselves.

Communication is also a relatively hard skill because it requires input from both sides of the conversation, however by making sure that you are putting your best foot forward when starting and carrying our a conversation you can also make sure that you get the most out of that conversation no matter how involved the other person is.

So are you interested in how to be an effective and concise communicator?

Then read on 😊 🗣️

WHY IS GOOD COMMUNICATION IMPORTANT?

Simply put, here is a list of reasons for what communication is useful for:

  • Reducing the number of misunderstanding or potential conflicts between people

  • Less time and energy is lost because less of those misunderstanding issues occur

  • You feel more understood and values as an individual

  • Being a better team worker and collaborator

  • Becoming better at empathizing and understanding people

  • Building more trust and respect with new people

  • Creating an environment in which everyone feels they can contribute with their ideas (makes people feel heard)

  • Coordinating of people in a successful way

ESSENTIAL SKILLS FOR GOOD COMMUNICATION

When it comes to communicating well, there are certain skills which I think come in very useful:

  • Having empathy: Empathy encourages you to better understand the other individual and their stance, which allows you to relate to their feelings more and in turn also listen to them more clearly.

  • Good listening skills: This is almost a no brainer one however listening to someone and truly listening to someone are two different things. Be a better listener by giving the other person time to talk and do not interrupt them with your own opinions, perspective or own thoughts. Listening means being the one who listens, not the one who talks all the time.

  • Using non verbal communication: Non verbal communication such as hand gestures, body movements and facial expression can greatly enhance the meaning of what you are tying to say and also encourages people to listen more since they feel like you are genuinely involved in a meaningful conversation with them.

  • Teamwork: In many scenarios in life we are tasked with showing and using our teamwork abilities where teamwork itself requires good communication skills in order to coordinate everyone. But at the same time collaborating with more people in your social circle also enhances your ability to communicate effectively since you may be asked to arrange or present something to someone as a group.

HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILLS

  1. Preparing a head of time: When we briefly take some time in advance to go through what we will say to someone or more importantly how we will communicate this, this often results in a better and clear conversation down the line which results in less potential miss communications or conflicts. This is especially useful for harder and less pleasant conversations we sometimes have to have with people.

  2. Being a good listener: When it comes to being a good listener, make sure that you are really there in the present moment when the person is telling you something and really make sure to listen and try to grasp what they are telling you. Give them space and time to finish saying what they have to say and then offer a suitable reply, but don't try to force too much of your opinion or perspective onto them because sometimes in more difficult situations, the other person may not be looking for you to help them but simply just someone who would listen to them.

  3. Being mindful of how you respond: The way in which you respond matters greatly to how the other person will receive and interpret your message so be mindful of the tone of your voice, pace of speech, finding the right time to respond (not interrupting the person excessively) and taking a couple of seconds to come up with an appropriate response to the situation.

  4. Gaining self awareness: Self awareness in this context has to do with being aware of how we talk and behave within conversations specifically how we say things, how we behave as listeners and how we will make sure both people get their point across effectively. Be mindful of those things when talking.

  5. Practicing public speaking: Speaking to groups of people you don't know or even to familiar groups such as a friend group, is also a good way to practice your speaking abilities because you have to learn how to both communicate your message yet also keep it clear and concise since there is more people listening so you want to avoid any misunderstandings and really make your point understandable and memorable.

  6. Developing an appropriate filter: Often times, depending on the type of conversation we are having, we have to develop certain “filters” which determine what we say or don't say in certain situations in order to make the conversation more appropriate to the setting. So before or during a conversation, think about what would be useful to say in this case or what you could omit to avoid any complications down the line.

  7. Using non verbal communication: Non verbal communication such as body language, hand gestures, facial expressions or eye contact are just as important as the verbal messages we convey to people in our life. These non verbal means of communication further help carry our message across and also tells the other person that we are actively engaged in a conversation with them and not make them feel like their times is being wasted.

  8. Asking for direct feedback: Sometimes asking for feedback on your communications skills for a friend, family members, colleague or even boss/ manager can also be a valuable use of our time since you get to hear a different perspective and perhaps they will mention things that you have not even thought about. Perhaps you will also find that while you were communicating in a certain way that you thought was appropriate, the other person may think otherwise and this is time for you to analyze wether this is true and if it is, how you can best alter your communication way to not get into arguments later on.

  9. Keeping an open mind: Sometimes as listeners we are tempted to always push forward our own opinion or thoughts on a topic, where we might hear one thing and the same second we are forming a counter argument to explain why we are right and why the other person is wrong. This I think is not the correct approach because it is more of a defense strategy than a means of communication so the trick is to really just keep an open mind when it comes to listening to the ideas and thoughts of others.

  10. Getting in tune with your own emotions: It is unpleasant if unwanted emotions come up in the wrong context so make sure to first learn to manage and process your own emotions before starting up a conversation again and in this way, beginning with a level emotional playing field.

🧠 KEY IDEAS

In this blog post we have discussed the topic of how to be better and more effective at communicating which we have done by first covering why good communication is useful, which skills are needed for good communication and lastly what are some genuine ways of improving your communication skills.

✏️ SOURCES

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