People Skills: Why They Matter
WHAT ARE PEOPLE SKILLS?
Most of us have probably come across the term “people skills,” but what is actually meant by this?
People skills, also known as soft or interpersonal skills, refer to skills, attributes, and competencies which allow us to work and cooperate well with others. These skills are all about how we interact with one another and how we communicate and exchange our ideas and thoughts in social circles.
Since being able to work and interact with others is an integral part of our lives, whether it be in school or in career settings, people skills are extremely important in both everyday life and also for your career or personal ambitions.
WHY ARE THEY IMPORTANT?
So now that we know what people skills are, what are, in practical terms, the main reasons for why they are important:
They are essential for building relationships.
Make up the foundation of a well-functioning team.
They minimize social conflict and misunderstandings between people.
Enable you to influence people's ideas and views.
Being able to effectively advance your career by building useful connections.
WHAT ARE THE ESSENTIAL SKILLS?
Effective communication: Being able to communicate well is essential in getting along with others, persuading them, as well as establishing clear boundaries and expectations.
Having patience with others: Although some of us are more patient than others, patience is key to maintaining a sense of level-headedness and calm, which further facilitates the building of enjoyable relationships without immediately going after short-term rewards.
Emotionally regulating yourself: This concerns being able to keep yourself calm and collected, as well as knowing when to speak up and when to hold back your thoughts and words at appropriate timing. It means being able to properly react to criticisms and effectively deliver critique as well.
Showing empathy: Empathy is essential for trying to understand the emotional state of someone else to the best of our ability, allowing us to relate better to others, be more vulnerable with them, and show genuine interest in the other person. All of these contribute to making the relationship stronger.
Having active listening skills: Have you ever listened to someone but not truly heard what they were saying? This is because listening and truly actively listening to what someone is saying are two different things. Active listening means that you let the person fully finish their thoughts, and only once they finish, you first reiterate what they have said to make sure you have fully understood them, and only then do you offer them your own perspective.
Being able to persuade others: Persuasion is quite a complex skill in itself, but it is heavily based on empathy and understanding the other person's motives and wants. If you are able to blend in valuable social skills such as being a good communicator and listener, you are much more able to persuade others and even negotiate with them.
Showing interest in others: People love it when we show interest in their ideas, beliefs, or daily activities. This is not to say we should only be talking about the other person, but showing interest in others can make a great start for a new friendship. If you show interest in someone, the other person is much more likely to reciprocate that back.
Having a good sense of humor: Humor is a very effective way to loosen up tense situations and make yourself more approachable to others, as everyone appreciates a laugh here and there. Laughter shows people that you are fun to be around and that there are other aspects than work with which people can relate to you.
Maintaining honesty: Honesty is an integral part of building long-lasting trusting relationships. It can result in positive compounding effects since if people see you are able to uphold a genuine relationship, that will attract more people towards you.
Leadership roles and abilities: There will most likely be times in our lives where we have to take up some sort of leadership roles. Leadership, in itself, is very much a soft people skill that encompasses many different kinds of skills such as assertiveness, listening, clear communication, empathy, and being able to coordinate and organize people well in groups.
Having good manners: This is rather a basic but often forgotten consideration, involving doing simple things such as saying please and thank you or being truly present when someone is talking to you or helping someone out when they clearly need a quick helping hand. These small gestures can be incredibly helpful in accelerating your own relationships and add an element of respect to daily social interaction.
HOW TO DEVELOP THESE SKILLS
When it comes to building and strengthening people skills, it is most effective to go into the world and simply practice than, for example, to approach it from a more theoretical standpoint, such as reading a book.
Below are a couple of ideas for how you can sharpen your own people skills:
Taking part in more team projects where you have to actively practice good listening and communication skills, as well as leadership roles.
Taking an (online) course or workshop with other people whom you can practice these key skills with.
Talking to someone new at your school or workplace.
Keeping the above-mentioned essential people skills in mind when interacting with people you already know.
Asking people who know you well for how they think you could improve your communication or empathy skills.
Becoming more aware of your non-verbal way of interacting with people, such as the type of body language which you use.
FINAL THOUGHTS
Overall, having a solid set of people skills is essential for being able to properly work well with other people, whether it be in a school or professional setting. It is also a skill which is becoming increasingly more needed and valued due to the incorporation of more technology into our daily lives, where practicing these foundational people skills can add a much-needed aspect of humanness into our daily lives as well as building valuable and trusting relationships in the process.
Go out and strike up a conversation with someone new.
Be willing to step out of your comfort zone and work on these skills because they most likely will be more universally and timelessly, applicable than you can imagine.
